Married Str8 Trio – Underwear & Swimwear Stigma Chat Part 1

Married Str8 Trio: Underwear Swimwear Stigma Chat Part 1Hey guys, The Married Str8 Trio is back with an underwear and swimwear stigma conversation. We’ll be discussing the stigmas we feel that are out there, the impacts we see from them, which ones hold us back, and the one we like defeated the most. So hang in there for a three part series on this one. Hope you enjoy.

What stigmas do you see related to men’s bikini and thong underwear?

The Bottom Drawer: The main stigma I see with skimpy underwear for men is that bikinis and thongs are looked at as feminine. Then that leads into a guy being gay if he likes that style of underwear, which in itself is a stereotype that if you are gay you are feminine. I also think they have a stigma that they are for male strippers.

Ron: For me wearing thong or brief bikini underwear is contrary to the modern macho though meta male style. Very much seen here in the UK as an ‘old man ‘ style given that they are stuck in the past. That said the gay thing always lurks around such brief styles. Though thongs are definitely seen as feminine and the preserve of strippers. Conjures up a thought of muscular oiled men in tiny G strings or thongs with large baying women tearing at their bulges with their red talons! For men who may consider wearing thongs an additional negative is given as not wishing to have something stuck in their ‘crack’ .

Blkmlthng: The stigmas that I see related to men’s bikinis and thong underwear are right in line with what Nate and Ron are stating. I am a heterosexual man who likes to wear this type of underwear for functional, practical reasons as well as they make me feel sexy. I tried to conform and wear the underwear that is “expected” of a straight man to wear, boxers or boxer briefs and through the years I have come to realize that’s not my preferred underwear style. While I do own boxer briefs and wear them from time to time, it’s more like once in a blue moon. Thongs, String Bikinis and Bikinis are my daily and preferred choice of underwear. I like the skimpier styles of underwear with patterns and prints and I mean it is underwear, who is going to see it!? lol The reaction I get from my wife is positive and helps me to continue the underwear styles I wear. Even if she wasn’t on board with it I would still wear these styles, it is just icing on the cake that she enjoys it. I think if the woman in a man’s life, his wife or girlfriend, would illicit a positive response about a man wearing a thong or bikini it would encourage more men to do so. I remember the first time my wife saw me in a string bikini and thong she stated she didn’t think I would wear such underwear but she liked the fact that I did.

What stigmas do you see related to men’s swim briefs, swim bikinis, and swim thongs?

The Bottom Drawer: Again I think people have the perception that only women wear revealing swimwear. So only reason a guy would wear something like that is if they are gay or want to show off their bulge. Of course that is the case for some, but that isn’t the consensus.

Ron: Most of the above applies to these garments as swimwear though the prominent bulge issue is always associated with being gay and showing off. I’d actually be interested to know what women really do think when they see a guy on a beach wearing a thong. Some of the forums I’ve read suggest they actually approve but put on the negative face to conform.

Blkmlthng: When it comes to swimwear I think it is based on the fact that women are celebrated for wearing more revealing styles and encouraged to do so while men are ridiculed, the butt of jokes and frowned upon for doing so.

With underwear being more a private matter, do you think the stigmas have more of an impact on guys wearing them or just being able to buy locally?

Ron: Buying locally had in the past been a very stressful adventure, with always the fear that someone was going to ridicule or draw attention to your purchase or worse still that you might someone you knew! I always found buying from an older female more relaxing as they seemed to perceive the fear and put you at ease. A local highland wear shop I used to frequent where I found miniscule mens bikini underwear had a lovely older lady who always put me at ease and often complimented my choice. Opportunities for local buying are so rare these days due to very few shops selling micro mens underwear so shopping online is a must. Though nowadays being a lot older I really don’t care anymore what people think and I’m hopefully thick skinned enough to shrug off any jokes or negative remarks.

Blkmlthng: I completely agree with Ron’s statements. Back in the early 2000’s when skimpy mens underwear was still available in the stores, I too would find an older female cashier to ring me up. I was always fearful that I would get teased or ridiculed and that happened once at K-mart. I decided to be bold one day and just got any cash register. A younger cute female cashier rang me up and I had a pack of Men’s Joe Boxer String Bikinis and Thongs in my purchase. As she was ringing my items up she was making small talk and flirting, I was flirting back and when she got to the String Bikinis and Thongs, I notice her eyes got wide and she began to giggle. I could tell she thought it was odd that this young guy was buying such underwear and she began to treat me differently as a customer and the friendly/flirtatious cashier became standoffish and kind of cold. I felt embarrassed and left many great deals and items of mens underwear I wanted because of that experience. Once the skimpy men’s underwear items began to not be available in stores I began online shopping and I loved the experience. The ability to take my time and read reviews and not feel rushed or embarrassed about buying underwear which to me is a private matter. I have buying underwear online now for close to 10 years and when this question was posed, I realized I haven’t bought a pair of underwear in stores in a while.

The Bottom Drawer: Guess we all did the same when buying in stores, but looking for a female cashier. There was one time when I was in line waiting to checkout that a girl ahead of me in school saw me and spoke to me, but don’t think she saw I was holding bikinis to buy. Bummer you had a negative experience buying in stores, but shows how some people look at men’s bikinis and thongs.

Looks like we agreed the stigmas that go with our underwear choice did make buying them a stressful situation. So those stigmas may have prevented others from buying them from the local stores. Then maybe that lead to stores not really carrying any or at the most one selection. With the rise of online shopping I think guys that really want to try thongs or bikinis will. My thought is with them being hidden under clothes from most people that the stigmas would be a little more at ease on guys’ minds.

Tune in next week for part 2. Comment and let us know your thoughts on stigmas with men’s underwear and swimwear.

3 Responses

  1. Teide says:

    Creo que con el paso de los años la “vergüenza” de ser visto comprando ropa interior minúscula se va superando. Hace unos meses en una tienda de Madrid en liquidación por cierre compré 6 thongs por € 0.99 cada uno y en un outlet store cerca de mi casa un jockstrap por € 1.00 (prendas que todavía no he estrenado) y no me importó que me vieran ni los empleados ni los demás compradores que hacían cola en la caja, pues estaban sueltas sin embalar.

    Cuando era más joven la ropa interior minúscula estaba en casi todas las tiendas y venía en cajitas que, aunque solían tener una foto en su exterior de la prenda o de alguien vistiéndola, no suponían problema para mostrarlas sin vergüenza en las cajas de venta.

  2. Jayinca says:

    Interesting how we all feel/felt more comfortable with the mature woman. I wonder why that is. Perhaps more mature woman are perceived to have a greater level of acceptance, or at the very least a higher level of decorum? A person who is out of relationship age range so that ‘need to impress’ stressor is removed as well?

    Also interesting that men’s minimalist underwear used to be sold in stores. I wonder if that ended due to a lack of demand or something else? The rise of online shopping perhaps?

    • I’d say it is more on the side decorum side. They’d probably notice what you are buying, but just scan it and move on. Still stressful either way for me, but more comfortable with a female cashier over male for sure. Probably due to demand with the rise of the boxer fashion fab. Glad I didn’t get stuck in that fad.

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