Swim Briefs and the Immature Encounters

Swim Briefs and the Immature Encounters
In my Myrtle Beach 2022 post I mentioned I’d expand on my encounters of remarks on my swim brief wearing. It was the first time I had anybody say anything related to my swim brief wearing. Until then people seem to tolerate it without feeling they had to say anything. I’ve even interacted a bit with a few people while wearing them over the last several years.

Maybe part of the success with avoiding the immaturity so long was the beach selection. We always avoided the popular beach areas that would get the high schoolers and college age kids. Typically, that’s the age group lacking maturity, but not always the case.

Let’s flash back to my Myrtle Beach vacation. It was our fourth pool and lazy river trip. The first remark I got was when I was walking from the lazy river to the pool. It was from a young, probably teenage kid who was holding the gate open for us. He said he liked my Speedo. I believe he was being sincere, because I think he probably liked the print of my Slugger’s swim brief. I just said thanks to him and continued to the pool.

After the pool we headed back to the lazy river, since the in-laws were there to see the kids float around it. When we were done, I dried off and wrapped my towel around me. My wife, daughter, and in-laws were heading through the gate out and I was waiting for my son to get his sandals on. While I was waiting, a guy of either college or high school age came up to me and said ‘What’s your number?.” I guess I’m a bit thick skulled and had no clue what he meant and asked “What number?” I was kind of thinking the condo number and why did he need it. Eventually he said it was a joke and I told him I didn’t get it. Then my son was ready and we headed to catch up with everyone. Didn’t hit me until we were out of the gate what he was trying to do. I assume the kid was bet or dared by his peers to do it that we’re hanging out at the hot tub.

My second immature encounter was a couple days later at the beach on our last day. I was out probably thigh deep in the waves helping the kids catch waves on their boogie boards. I started to hear a kid maybe around 10 say I like your underwear. I went with the ignoring method. He kept repeating it and I continued to ignore it. His female companion started joining in and they started more of a chant with we like your underwear red, white, and blue. I stuck to my guns and continued with my ignoring method. They were persistent at it for I have no clue how long. What really irritated me was I saw them go to a group of adults right by the shore line not too far a way sitting in their chairs. Though the adults were on the opposite side of me from where the kids were yelling from. Soon after I noticed them, they returned to the water and started their chant again. I suppose it is possible the adults did not hear them, since my kids and wife didn’t say anything about it either and they were closer. I’m not sure what reaction they were looking for from me, but felt ignoring them was the way to go.

I guess eventually I was bound to run into some immature people. I know some have said it kind of takes the wind out of their sails. I now kind of know what they mean. It can lower the confidence and make you second guess your choice a bit. I always kind of have a mental battle with it until I have a chance to hit the beach then I’m driven to wear what I want to. Luckily, I’ve now been pretty consistent with my swim brief wearing that I was able to shake these encounters off. It’s irritating and frustrating that we can’t just enjoy ourselves and wear what we want. I guess women can have similar issues with inappropriate comments directed at them too.

Have you had an immature encounter? How did you handle it? Just ignore it and move on? Did it affect your confidence?

31 Responses

  1. Black Stallion76 says:

    Yes. You will encounter immature individuals, and unfortunately age is not a guaranteed indicator of maturity, however behavior is a guaranteed indicator of maturity.
    ignore the rude immature comments and go on and enjoy your life. I continue to wear my bikini swim brief, of many cuts, some more brief than others, and I’ve had no complaints. Those who have complained in the past, got no more attention than there man on the moon. As long as you’re confident, and acting normal, you’re not hurting anybody at all.

  2. BlackStallion76 says:

    On a side note, I just wish that with all these new inclusions, thongs were more acceptable. In this day and age since accountability, and inclusions, and allowing people to be themselves are on the forefront, of human rights.

  3. swimmer78 says:

    I think you did the right thing by ignoring the “twerps”. That’s what I would do in the same situation. They are just looking to get a reaction from you. Once you start reacting in anger or defensiveness, they have control over you.
    I haven’t had many negative responses to my swim bikinis. Had one “incident” last year at our usual beach spot where some young guys yelled something as they drove at me as they drove by in a jeep. It did shake my confidence briefly for few minutes, but I recovered it quickly.
    I was actually out with my family at the beach today wearing a bright turquoise Sporti Euro. And then later at a relatives house hanging out at their pool in the same bikini. Nothing was said by anyone at either place, but we were in a pretty isolated spot on the beach.
    Back in May may wife and I spent a weekend at the beach and it was very crowded. Again I wore a Sporti Euro and got no comments from anyone. I think those encounters are quite rare and guys let it worry them way out of proportion with reality.
    My confidence has been stronger this summer than ever before.

  4. DonS says:

    No comments, but I don’t do much public swimming anymore.

    The only negative was the look from the 30-odd years old woman I mentioned in a story a few years ago. Just briefly so this makes sense, I came across a bikini top at the water’s edge as I was walking along a beach. I picked it up, intending to remove it, when I heard a female’s yell. I saw her out in the water (this area was very shallow). She had been dumped by a wave, her top had come off and been washed out of reach before she could grab it, and the dump had injured her arm. I was wearing a Kiniki half-back swim tanga under shorts, so stripped down and waded out to help her. Having got the top back on, we went back to the beach and her look I interpreted as a negative one. Nothing was said by either of us, and I may have interpreted this wrongly. We walked back to the main area, and from the little conversation we had, she knew I had a female partner with me (who was at a conference that day).

    Whatever the look really was, I just ignored it and initially thought it was poor since I had just helped her. But, like I say, she may have meant something else by her look.

    I’m old enough now to have the courage to ignore any nasty comments, and when younger, well, Speedos and similar brief swimwear was normal for any males of any age, so there were no negative comments back then.

    • T says:

      I remember that story well, Don, and how you behaved like the perfect gentleman in what could have been a very embarrassing situation for the lady in question. I wonder if her negative reaction to your skimpy tanga was fuelled by homophobia and the outdated stereotype that only gay guys wear them? I’m guessing you felt that might be her initial impression which you were keen to dispel by bringing the fact you had a female partner into your brief(no pun intended) conversation.

  5. T says:

    You often here people in the public eye like musicians and actors saying that even though 99% of their reviews are positive, it’s the negative 1% that tends to sting and linger in their heads. I think the same applies to those of us who go against the flow with our choices of daring swimwear.
    I don’t think you, Nate, were being thick skulled or slow in not getting the “what’s your number” comment from the college age guy right away. In fact, I was reminded of the phrase “never a truer word spoken in jest”(or something similar) so it’s not that far fetched to think the guy was actually commenting on how hot you looked in your speedo (which we here can attest too)lol, but didn’t want to make it obvious.
    The younger kids in the water with their childish chants will probably be part of the dork shorts brigade throughout their teenage years and beyond, while you and other likeminded individuals will continue to enjoy the delights of wearing skimpy swimwear.
    I can only recall one negative encounter on a beach which happened a number of years ago. I was with an Italian friend and his wife on a Sicilian beach. I was wearing a Kiniki half back string Tanga and was lying face down when some Italian guys walked by and started laughing. I can’t be sure if it was directed at me, or if I was just being paranoid(pre nudist days) lol, but I consoled myself with the fact that my swimsuit was briefer than any that the local studs were wearing. Lol🍑
    Although this final encounter didn’t take place on a beach, it is related to the subject matter.
    A couple of years ago I got into the habit of sitting on my front doorstep to catch the last of the sun after it left my back garden. Although there is a public path that borders the edge of my garden, it is usually neighbours that go by and an occasional stranger. Because I can only be seen from the front and partly from the side, l can wear a G-string, or as on this occasion, a skimpier C-string. I was sitting enjoying the sun when a mixed group of teenagers suddenly appeared and began walking around the perimeter of my garden. As they turned to go up the side of my house, one of the guys must have made a negative comment, which I didn’t catch. However, I did hear one of the girls say “Shut up! He looks a lot better than you!” which was unexpected, but good to hear.
    Long may you continue to grow in confidence with your speedo outings, Nate, and your recent swim thong purchases bode well for a 🍑🍑🍑revealing future. Lol

  6. Bill says:

    I haven’t had any negative comments to my face. Only compliments form guys and girls about being bold enough to wear my bikini swim trunks at the pool. Now I’m starting to see others wear them as well. Let’s not get discouraged. Keep pushing foward. Eventually we will be the norm!!!!!

    • Black Stallion76 says:

      You also have to face your worst enemy faces to face, head on, because this individual, will have more impact on you thank anybody else. That critic is”YOU”.
      Stop worrying about what other think, abs what others are saying, it is of no importance. I can’t make it any more simpler than that. Don’t be discouraged not even by you.
      I’ve even had days, where I didn’t like what I had on, but you have to knuckle up, and say it’s fine. You not really going for a fashion show. You going to enjoy yourself, get some sun, which I’m told had vitamins, and feel free to a certain extent.

  7. Ian says:

    I’m really sorry you went through that. I don’t understand why people feel the need to degrade others or let their children degrade others. Guess it makes them feel better about themselves. But it’s a sad way to live. From your other post, it sounds like you still had a good time on your trip which is what matters most.

    Personally, I’ve had three experiences that I can remember that were very negative. I’ve been teased about my suit in a flirty way. I don’t count that as negative. I’ve also overheard comments about me. I like both of these types of attention and it makes me feel noticed. So I’m not counting those.

    No, the negatives were all just women laughing at me. Once on a beach, once in a hotel hallway and once right outside of a waterpark. In two of the cases, the women were trying to suppress their laughter but couldn’t, which really made it hurt even more–because it was like they were trying to contain themselves but I guess I was just so ridiculous in their eyes they couldn’t even hold it in. And yeah totally took the wind out of my sails, made me feel like a clown, made me want to run and change into the baggiest trunks on Earth 🙁

    How did I react? On the beach, I smiled back like I was in on the joke. Which was a really bad thing to do for myself because it basically denied who I am and was just joining her in s**ting on myself. The other two, I just ignored and just pretended I didn’t notice them laughing.

    I think women definitely have their own sets of challenges. But one thing they’re doing for themselves that’s positive is trying to promote the idea of body positivity and wearing what you want. Some day, hopefully, that will expand to men’s swimsuits as well.

    • BlackStallion76 says:

      But the thing about the women, they too are also hypocritical, in thinking that these style bikini briefs are only for them, and that men should not wear them. So in reality, you really can’t even let up on the females either until everybody, is fully understanding that it’s your choice. Now on the other hand, if you were to see a woman donning something, that society mocks her for, you must still show support. We must put an end to double standards.

    • DonS says:

      How old were these women. If younger, the laughter might just have been embarrassment, and trying to suppress it because they knew they should not be embarrassed. Just guessing another explanation for the situations.

      • Ian says:

        All three were late 20’s/early 30’s I would say. I didn’t feel like it was that kind of laughter. I felt like they were laughing at me. But who knows

  8. Mike says:

    Sorry to hear that you had a negative experience on the each, lucky they weren’t my children, as there would have been words! I know my children wouldn’t have said anything, as I’ve only ever worn small bikini / speedos to the beach and they would have been in speedos too.
    Last summer, we went to the beach almost every day and as I said, I only wore my small bikini briefs, I’ve got quite a collection, so I always enjoy wearing a different one from last time.
    I’m starting to get more confidence in wearing smaller bikinis and even swim thongs, although I’ve only worn the thong once. This summer I intend to wear my thong on the beach much more often. I can’t wait for summer to come, especially as I’ve lost a bit of weight, so look a bit better in them, even although I wasn’t terribly overweight, it does increase my confidence when I think I also look good in them.
    I also have a lot of bikini underwear, that are very thin Ice silk material that i’m thinking of wearing, as the darker colours dont go so transparent.

    • BlackStallion76 says:

      I wish the US was as liberal as other countries in this manner. There are few to no places to wear thongs. And there aren’t many places for adults, because everybody takes their kids everywhere, and it seems this country revolves around kids.

  9. A says:

    was wearing a rather daring leopard print high cut bikini to the pool the other day and got a somewhat ‘look of disaproval’ ….from a 60ish year old woman. Gotta shrug it off….(happened in the steam room) She actually was friendly to me after that initial look and said i gotta ‘turn around to get the other side) ..which is in reference to the fact that I was standing purposely close to the steam/vaporizer…In that same steam room as I was facing the wall steaming my front side I heard a couple and a guy that were to my rear talk about ‘colours’….lol. I think it could have been in reference to the leopard print. They went on to talk about colours and music…bet they were talking in code! I did get hit on kinda by a older bodybuilding woman though. This is going back a couple months when I rocked a super skimpy tanga bikini and she said “bold cut/style”. She may have even been hitting on me a bit. She herself was in a two piece bikini and being a bodybuilder she was in shape. I personally arent into woman bodybuilders though but she was a nice lady to talk to and I think she ‘got it’. I felt like she understood what I was doing. I think the bodybuilding community has traditionally been the place where showing off is accepted but that being said it does seem that there was a change over the years? Still seems like the 80s/90s and maybe early 2000’s you would see the trademark bodybuilder in speedos…unlike today. Ive noticed that most fit youngish guys these days dont wear speedos still. They definitely would have the bodies to wear them. Theres some fit/’ripped’ guys at a public pool i see regularly but theyre always in board shorts. Ive even ‘talked speedos’ with them and they’ve always said ‘wear whatever you want’ but they all seem so ‘herdish’. All this being said, I’ve also experimented with wearing swim shorts again and it does seem kind of ‘night and day’. I get the social assurance that I’m not ‘rocking the boat’ and its even tempting some days to just go back to wearing shorts only for swimwear. I dont think i’ll go that far though. I do try to be flexible as in some people in my life may not be ready to see me in skimpy swimwear…so there is that……wow this is long winded : )

    • swimmer78 says:

      Thanks for sharing your recent experiences. I definately think the female bodybuilder appreciated your confidence. I know that made you feel good to get some positive attention like that. Since she is older she probably remembers when guys in bodybuilding were not as insecure about wearing posing bikinis. I not too familiar with the bodybuilding community , but do know that homophobia is rampant with the men in their gym”bro culture”. If you ever browsed the misc forum (infamous) on bodybuilding.com you know exactly what I’m talking about. A lot of “no homo” bs comments posted on there. When I was real young like 18 or 19 I was into weight lifting and wanted to try bodybuilding. I never got into and am glad I didnt now. So many bodybuilders have ruined their health or died by steroid use.

      You are right about those fit guys seeming herdish. It’s the conformist attitude you see with so many guys in their choices.

      Keep rocking the bikinis!

  10. Crossfithong says:

    I’m sorry you got those experiences but nobody said that this path would be easy for us.
    I had once a bad experience in an adult resort, I was wearing RICK MAJORS LOW RISE SWIM THONG FLUORESCENT FLOWERS at the pool with my husband and nobody were around, the manager approached asking me to put some shorts cause the female staff was working around and the owner of the hotel was coming and she was very conservative and it was inappropriate to display my body like that. So, I felt awkward at first but I thought immediately, I paid for this place and I’m going to have an amazing time so I response him back,
    I told him that I choose this “adults only” resort cause I didn’t want to have this kinda childish comments, and they female staff and the conservative owner weren’t my problem, they are working in a hotel were they must be prepared to see people, and I acuses him to be homofóbic and the real problem was two males in the building doing absolutely nothing, only tanning.
    So, I will give you this advice, don’t ever let someone else ruin your vacations, their concerns or ideas or children are not your responsibility, are theirs, and if people dear to tell me something negative about my swimsuit, they must be prepare to get a bitchy answer cause I’m as free as they are to wear whatever they want.

    • T says:

      I also remember this story. I believe you had gone from a very liberal place(was it PV) to a small dare I say backwards thinking resort owned by a very narrow minded religious woman who really shouldn’t have been advertising her business as any kind of adultS only resort. I’m sure after reading about your horrendous experience, it wasn’t just the gay community that gave that place a wide berth.

    • Mike says:

      I’d say you were pretty reserved in replying as you did, I can’t imagine someone telling me to cover up at a pool while I was tanning. Especially as it was advertised Adults Only.

    • Jason says:

      I would have asked her, “Are you also going to ask women visiting the pool to cover up? Why is it appropriate for women to wear bikinis and and other swimwear, and you can clearly see the outline of their vulvas or the bulge of their pubis (fat pussy) and they are not expected to cover up or wear boardshorts also?!

    • Jason says:

      Some women have the bulge too, not just men, Women who have a thick and large pubis (what is commonly know as “camel toe”), and it is clearly and noticeably showing through their swim suit, regardless what they are wearing, be it a one piece or two piece swimsuit. Personally I don’t mind it and like to see a woman sporting her vagina bulge through her swimsuit, but don’t be a hypocrite and demand that I cover my bulge while you ignore hers!

  11. John David says:

    I see it in a different way. Maybe those kids didn’t know what a speedo/swim brief was and might have mistaken them as underwear (benefit of doubt). They already have an interest and curiosity by saying that they like it. I would’ve responded, “It’s not underwear, it’s a speedo”, and then explain what it is so they understand how to differentiate between them. That way, they will understand it should be normal for a man to wear a speedo to the beach and not discriminate them when they grow up. Hell, they even might start wearing them from such a young age!

  12. Jeff says:

    I was at a beach in CT a couple weeks ago, by myself in a quiet section. Laying out reading a book in a swim bikini and a “frat boy” type 18 or 19 year old walked by with a girl. By the way both were wearing shorts, shirts, sneakers and socks while on the beach on a 90 plus degree day. And I heard him laughing as I was reading as they walked past me…I put my book down and looked right at him and asked what was so funny? He got soooo scared and just about ran away. Leaving his girlfriend behind.

  13. Bikenswim says:

    When I was a kid, I was called names when I was fully clothed. But I confidently wear skimpy bikinis and thongs at crowded beaches since the 1960’s, and I’ve never had anyone harass me as I roam around. Occasionally if I am wearing a thong, someone will want to take a selfie with me. I often wear colorful flat-front women’s bikini bottoms or gaff thongs. I am a hairy manly guy, more impressive or scary when almost naked. Once time I saw some twerps hassling a small Asian man, so I went over and they scattered like cockroaches.

  14. Brendan says:

    I’m in Myrtle now. It’s off. Tons of short shorts at the stores. Zero on the beach.

  15. Brendan says:

    I wore squarecuts much of the time. Chilly already. But still rocked a tight and short suit when possible.

  16. Frank says:

    I never had someone call me a name to my face. However, I did have a lady down in Wildwood NJ come up to me and comment how inappropriate, insulting, offensive and disgusting it was that I dared to wear a Speedo around other families with children. How it was so inappropriate for kids to have to see the outline of a guy’s d**k, and that I am a sicko.
    I responded with, well if someone is staring at my d**k that is their problem. If you teach your kids that guys have a penis, I don’t think they would be offended by noticing that I have one too. And besides, that’s your kids over there, right? Well if I were you, I would be more concerned with the fact that your teenage daughter is wearing a loose bikini where her boobs are falling out and a bottom that is so tight that you can see the outline of everything, all on a beach where there are older guys who are eyeing and drooling over her, more than the fact that I am wearing a speedo. She huffed at me and walked aware mumbling.

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